beta testing

awaits

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the first week of the holidays has ended. and what have i accomplished? nothing, other than finishing up my history ia. 

or maybe not. this first week has given me time to think about a lot of things. the doom and despair of the earlier part of the week is now gone, replaced by even more things to contemplate. and so, all of you who cared, thanks a bunch. much appreciated, even if i dont say so. 

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what am i to do with myself. so many choices, so many plans to make. so much effort to put in. but maybe for once, ill put in the effort and actually try hard enough. 

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if you play the bass guitar and think youre awesomexz, give me a call. NOW.

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you, me, and us.

minute

insignificant

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chem was interesting, but could have been more interesting if he didnt repeat all the stuff we already learnt. guitar was normal, meaning a severe lack of attendance.

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these dreams they haunt

your face so clear

and yet i can’t find the words

comforting

touch

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today was a tiring day, of extreme proportions. going to school for chinese was a blur, because something was weighing on my brain and stopping me from thinking. the trip to funan was disappointing, because they just had to release red alert 3 later in the afternoon. still at least i got my dvds. time to burn. the museum is a tiring place. especially wandering around in the dark with my poor night vision contacts and a heavy audio companion hanging from my neck. throw in another 45 minute wait for red alert 3 to arrive, and add in all the walking that i did. oh and plus getting bitten by mosquitoes at my brother’s iba workplace. all i want to do now is lie down and think. or read. whichever is better from getting me away from my predicament.

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the puzzle pieces falling into place.

faces forming, yours and mine.

the figures all in motion. 

but the picture isnt all i want it to be.

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scary personality tests which can somehow guess my feelings and the reasons for them are just scary. but maybe what i think i want, isnt actually what i really want. or need for that matter. like something i read in a readers digest article recently, sometimes all it takes is a listening ear or a hand to hold.

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but looking on the brighter side, i’m now the owner of Red Alert 3, Premier Edition. copy 6019 of the 8000 here in Singapore. too bad i wont get to play it till tomorrow. plus there are no more countries to pick in the game. just 3 factions. still, ive waited long enough to play this.

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I saved myself
For someone
Somewhere’s sweet caress
Something goes wrong
And all I sought was happiness

moving on

grinning through the rain

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im finally done with book 3 of the inheritance “should-have-been-trilogy-but-is-now-cycle”. i must say, immersing myself into fictional realms of dwarves, dragons, elves and magic is dangerous business. especially when im feeling the need for a little escapism from this all too real world we live in. prospects for the holidays dont seem too good, but since when did we ever have cause to expect better. still, the fact that i havent planned out what im going to do with my time is not helping at all.

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zodiac is one freaky show. and a long one at that. but i guess it does fulfill its description of being a thriller, since it kept me riveted in my seat throughout all the exciting parts. or it could just have been my overactive imagination making too much out of the drama. still, it was fun, if not scary.

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TO ALL GUITARISTS. PLEASE REMEMBER TO GO FOR GUITAR PRACTICES THIS WEEK. AND THE NEXT. AND THE NEXT. THANKS. 

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the look in her eyes

harmony

smiling through the rain

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this has been an exciting week. both action packed and filled with disappointment. but thankfully, the joy is enough to override any negativity when i look back on the past 5 days. i really thank God for my class, and i wouldnt give it up for any other. games day, the last day of school, and oktoberfest, sure made me realise all that. somehow the outcome didnt matter. just being there, surrounded with the people we’ve been with for the past year. guys, you make school that much more bearable

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i need to go brush up on my singing. if only i had luke chan’s voice. sigh. why do i always do worse for the actual performances.

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and to distract me from all the work and emoness, i have bought a new mouse. a razer diamondback 3g. that, combined with the prospect of installing call of duty 4, should be more than enough to keep me busy. even though i shouldnt be busy with that. someone help.

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but you just wont go away

stupor

daze

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one more day till the end of the school term. and the start of another period of work. chinese b exam, chem oly, ee, ias, deans lists. and all we must do is survive, at least until december. then a holiday will give us space to recharge, and regain our whatever bits of sanity we lost over the course of the year. and then, the real thing begins.

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this year has been a quick one, and yet not without its fair share of happenings. i have learnt a lot this year, whether it be with regards to life, God, guitar, or even academics. hopefully next year will be even better. still, i am thankful for all that has transpired. the new bonds forged, the lessons learnt, the experiences unforgotten. 

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this time next year, will i still remember? will i be the same? will the things that matter now still matter? i guess i wont know, until i look back when i reach there. but somehow the road always looks different after you travel it. the paths seem to shorten and narrow, till it seems insignificant, almost. but not quite.

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oh to find the passion again. if only novelty didnt die out. then learning would be an exponential curve. 

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we were so near we could touch

but she was so far away

and from across the room

i wondered if she noticed.

reckoning

of wits

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the results were released today. and as with all days, it is a mix. a turmoil of feelings. i guess i should be glad with what i got, considering the lack of effort i put in. and yet i know i could have done better, if only i had played a few less hours of computer and watched a few less episodes. one step at a time, or so i tell myself. just a little delusion now and then to make myself feel good.

History HL: 75.4%

Math HL: 73.75%

Chem HL: 83.3%

Eng SL: 72%

Chinese B SL: 86%

Bio SL: 90%

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history was a disappointment, but i shall have to hope i answer the question the next time. chem was a godsend, what with the enormous moderation that brought my grade up one. math needs one more mark. darn the time limit.

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SUTA was a success, somewhat. i guess we should be glad we even got anyone to attend, what with the tremendous apathy rampant in school. but still i suppose i was hoping for better. although the lack of a crowd made the movie screening more informal and homely. almost. 

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for this i am thankful. the many things that have been given to me. 

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Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
Ill be watching you

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http://picasaweb.google.com/danielyeews/myraid

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in the event of something happening to me

calm

before the rampant destruction

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so we get our results back. and i find out if i have any hopes of convincing my parents to let me get guitar hero 4, to waste my entire holidays away with. i guess its good either way. if i get it, its awesome and ill get to play. if i dont, ill just be bored and HOPEFULLY will end up doing work instead. okay fine maybe im just an idealist getting carried away.

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its funny how i do relatively better in tests that no one studies for and when it doesnt matter. yet when it comes to the real deal its never as good. i just have to hope it wont apply to my SATs, as well as my exams next year.

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i hadn’t planned on blogging today until i came to this sudden realisation about myself. within the past 2 years, i have degenerated from getting distracted by people, to getting distracted by anime, to getting distracted by games, and finally, getting distracted by nothing. usually i turn on the comp and do no work because im playing something. but now i turn it on and forget what im supposed to do. and dont do anything. not even play. sigh.

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i need to clear the stack of books on my table. i usually have no problem clearing books that are not related to work, especially if theyre fiction. and yet i still have 3 sandman books, 1 james patterson novel, 2 superman graphic novels, Brisingr and a reread of Eldest to finish. what is wrong with me.

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and that was when i ruled the world

backdate

fillings/feelings

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the week that just ended has been a really long one. it feels like a whole month has passed since the exams ended, but in reality we’ve only had a temporary respite from the work that is to follow. still i must say that my holidays have never been this packed before. which is good because at least i did stuff, but bad because i didnt do work.

the only 2 times ive ever been to starbucks happened over the week. the only time ive played guitar hero properly was over the week. and i dont think ive ever been out every other day before. fun stuff eh.

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the photography exhibition was interesting stuff. its amazing to see how good people can be at something they love and enjoy doing. i only wonder, if i was that passionate about anything, if i could ever be that good. i guess thats one thing i should bring myself to try, just that somehow i lack the energy at present to do it.

cycling was equally exciting. especially the long talks along the way, and of course the nice sun shining down on us. ahhh i need to get out more. 

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but your words

they mean so much

if ever

we should know

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every city had one. the man sitting quietly at a street corner. shabbily dressed, looking all forlorn and lonely. he hardly moved, except maybe once in a while when a change of scenery was desired. the wonderers we called them. even as we despised them with all our being, we envied them for something we could not quite describe. they were beneath us, unworthy of our attention, or so we told ourselves to distract us from the inner yearning we felt to find out what it would feel like to be one. it could be their detachment from all the trappings of society. the fact that time seemed immaterial to one who spent hours on end contemplating. contemplating what? we may never know, for fear of becoming one of them. 

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this lack of direction is discomforting. the end in sight, with no idea how to get there. and the haunting knowledge that this end is but a checkpoint in a longer race. 

things to do:

1) History IA

2) Chem Oly

3) Theory

4) EE

5) Chinese IB Exam

6) CAS

7) Guitar

*) survive

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a/side